THE EUROVISION 2015 has come to a close, with Mans Zelmerlow taking the crown for Sweden.

It was a long, tough journey, but we got there.

1. Conchita literally rose like a phoenix

Well, was lowered to the stage like a phoenix doesn’t have as good a ring to it.

She was basically the main event.

2. France took a load of naked men on stage

OK, not quite, but it sure looked like it for a minute.

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3. The UK mortified themselves

OK, OK, we didn’t get in but at least we didn’t enter this.

They got five points though, thanks partially to us.

Now now, don’t be jealous.

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4. There was SO MUCH KISSING

In the audience.

In the acts.

Love <3

5. People really didn’t get why Australia were there

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Wait, what?

6. The wind machine was a very real and constant source of distress

At least for those watching. The beaufort scale exploded.

7. Latvia came dressed as the salsa dancer emoji

There’s always one, isn’t there?

8. Conchita channeled her inner Father Ted fan

9. The drummer in the interval act was the HAPPIEST MAN ALIVE

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10. Johnny Logan and his white suit showed up in the winners montage

A Johnny moment is always a good moment.

11. Women announcers wouldn’t stop disappearing

Sure, it was a technical fault, but we also suspect Suzy, Estonia and Nadia from Georgia just went to black before they could announce their points.

Don’t worry, they found them in the end!

12. Russia’s ultimate Dad joke

Oh, you!
https://vine.co/v/eqX0YdFiPOZ

13. Sweden take the crown

Kerstin Joensson Kerstin Joensson

Mans says “we are all heroes, no matter who we are, who we love, what we believe in, we are all heroes.” after giving Conchita a massive hug.

Here’s the song, a worthy winner:

Eurovision 2015 as it happened: Flying Conchita, vanishing women, and Swede heroes>