THE CHRISTMAS PRESENT struggle has begun in earnest once again.
What to get for your mam? Your Grandad? Your office Secret Santa? Auntie Carmel? How do you ensure you get them something they’ll cherish or find useful or entertaining?
Sometimes it’s the crappest presents that turn out to be the best.
Presenting: The best worst Christmas presents ever…
Socks n Jocks
You hated them as a surly teen, but now they are the Holy Grail of presents, ensuring that your arse and feet are properly clad for at least the first six months of the year.
The Grease 2 DVD
Starring Michelle Pfeiffer and Maxwell Caulfield (Rex Manning to those in the know), this is one of the best worst films ever*. A fine gift.
*See also: Showgirls, Con Air, Mac and Me
Crocs
Nah I could never wear a pair of those. The state of them. No I won’t try them on. Oh go on so I’ll give them a g…. MOTHER OF GOD! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE?
Don’t knock ‘em til you’ve tried ‘em.
Scratch cards
Hey, three stars and you might get to meet Marty Whelan! (That’s still how it works right?)
Novelty crap
Emergency stress relief (bubble wrap)? An excellent way to pass a few minutes on Christmas Day.
A scratchable world map? I’ll put it in the bathroom, and show off about my travels.
Snowman poo? Delicious! And so breath-freshening!
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