IT’S CHRISTMAS AND you know what that means: our ideas of what constitutes a breakfast have been thrown out the window. There are no rules anymore. You can eat a deep fried Mars bar if you like and nobody will judge you.
Here are some acceptable Christmas breakfasts.
1. Garlic bread
If not now, when?
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2. A Selection Box
The one time of the year that a Fudge bar constitutes a breakfast.
3. Celebrations
I hear that a few Bountys technically counts as one of your five a day. Coconut and all that.
4. Biscuits
BUT NOT THE GOOD BISCUITS!
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5. Ferrero Rocher
Because you’re worth it.
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6. Thai crisps, guacamole and hummus
Sure look, it’s practically vegan.
7. Chocolate torsades
“Will I have porridge or a gooey chocolate pastry? Gooey chocolate pastry all the way, thanks.”
8. Pringles
“F**k it, it’s Christmas.” – everyone’s attitude to breakfast right now.
9. Terry’s Chocolate Orange
If you’re not having a Terry’s Chocolate Orange for breakfast, you’re not doing Christmas right.
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10. Cheese and crackers
*horses into Wensleydale on fancy basil crackers”
It’s healthier than chocolate, right? RIGHT?
11. Prosecco
*clink clink*
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12. Mince pies
Love ‘em or hate ‘em, mince pies are the *ultimate* Christmas breakfast.
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Merry Christmas everyone!
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