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If you get a double in an English pub it’s about the equivalent of a shot and a half by Irish standards. A single spirit measure is 25ml in England, while an Irish measure is closer to 35ml.
7. It’s hard to find a good pint of Guinness
Even in the many, many, Irish pubs. You’re in lager territory now.
9. You will never subconsciously pronounce ‘TH’ again
Say it again, say turty tree and a turd! Potato!
10. People look at you weird if you say hello
In parts of rural Ireland, waving or not saying hello when you walk by someone is almost rude. Do this in London while out for a run and prepare to be treated like an alien.
11. You cause confusion over the smallest things
Show your communion photos and you look like a child bride. Refer to college and you mean uni.
Monday 23 December, 2024
Monday 23 December, 2024
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13 problems only Irish people in London will understand
IF YOU’VE MADE the trip across the pond, you’ll know how hard it is to be in a sort of emigrate limbo.
1. You’ve basically moved to a bigger, taller, more crowded and expensive Dublin
2. It takes longer to get the bus from the airport to your mam’s than it does to fly into the country from London in the first place
3. On that note, you’re not far enough to get out of big events. Mammy expects you home for the smallest of gatherings
Which involves a lot of tailing your suitcase into work on Fridays with you and mastering the art of getting through security in a jiffy.
4. Friends kip at yours when they have ANY reason to go to London whatsoever
Gig? Sporting event? Show? Business trip? Visiting the cereal cafe? Oh sure you can stay at mine.
5. Changing cash is a constant and very real nightmare
You definitely lose tenners between all the back and forth.
6. Measures aren’t the same
If you get a double in an English pub it’s about the equivalent of a shot and a half by Irish standards. A single spirit measure is 25ml in England, while an Irish measure is closer to 35ml.
7. It’s hard to find a good pint of Guinness
Even in the many, many, Irish pubs. You’re in lager territory now.
8. You have to change your whole crisp belief system
Your standard cheese and onion in a pub are not Tayto or King, they’re Walkers. Shivers.
And they’re blue, not red! Red are ready salted, the monsters.
9. You will never subconsciously pronounce ‘TH’ again
Say it again, say turty tree and a turd! Potato!
10. People look at you weird if you say hello
In parts of rural Ireland, waving or not saying hello when you walk by someone is almost rude. Do this in London while out for a run and prepare to be treated like an alien.
11. You cause confusion over the smallest things
Show your communion photos and you look like a child bride. Refer to college and you mean uni.
12. Pret has ruined you
What do you have to do for a Gym Bunny and chicken and avocado wrap around here?
13. You’ve become one of those ‘Well, in London…’ people
Stand to the RIGHT dammit, like in London.
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