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Dublin: 13 °C Thursday 14 November, 2024

7 important features an Irish social media site would need

A face blurring feature is a must.

AS ANOTHER SOCIAL media website is floated on the New York stock exchange, we decided to take a look at what would make a truly great Irish social network.

Here’s what it would need:

1.  No friend requests

No need for this, sure we all know each other anyway.

paddy-barnes-is-greeted-by-an-taoiseach-enda-kenny-1582012-2-621x500 You're Martin's cousin, aren't you? INPHO / Cathal Noonan INPHO / Cathal Noonan / Cathal Noonan

2. Event invites without times

Because who actually turns up to an event on time in Ireland?

shutterstock_57725023 (1) Yep. I'm pretty late, all right. www.shutterstock.com www.shutterstock.com

3.  A ‘fake check-in’ button

www.shutterstock.com www.shutterstock.com

For when you disappear on a night out and you need to convince everyone you were just “outside having a chat”.

4.  Hiberno-English spell checker

Hitone.ie Hitone.ie

As ‘banjaxed’ and ‘eejit’ are perfectly sensible words and should not appear underlined in red every time you write them.

5.  Irish-only trending topics

If it isn’t the weather, Love/Hate or the government, it isn’t spoken about on social media in Ireland.  So, this feature narrows down trending topics so nobody gets confused.

6.  FaceBlur

EmbarrassingIrishNightlifePhotos EmbarrassingIrishNightlifePhotos

When your friends tag you in that 3am photo in the middle of Coppers dance floor, you don’t have to untag yourself, just simply blur your worse-for-wear face out. Job done.

7.  In-direct messages

shutterstock_118349899 I said, do you like GAA? Shutterstock Shutterstock

We all know that Irish people can’t speak their mind, especially in the matters of love. This feature lets you awkwardly dance around any topic until the person you are messaging finally gets the picture.

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Author
Dale Longmore
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