FOR SOME JAMMY people, today is the last day of work before Christmas. Those people can settle into the season fully, safe in the knowledge that the working world is far, far away.

Do you know how lucky you are? Please, allow us to inform you.

You’re one of the few people that actually finish work today

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Retail workers, people in the media (ahem) and basically everyone else is working until Tuesday at the very least.

You get to spend three of the most stressful days far from the madding crowd

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If you’ve got everything done, there’s absolutely no need for you to leave the house from Monday to Wednesday.

If you still have stuff to do, you can carefully choose when to avoid the madness.

You’re probably not back until after the New Year

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Two long weeks of freedom, stretching out before you: a state of being commonly known as The Dream.

Driving Home for Christmas is basically the theme song of your life now

And everyone wants that. Everyone.

Christmas has actually begun for you

This is you:

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This is the rest of us:

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