LIVING WITH YOUR other half can be a beautiful thing.
Once you follow these rules, of course.
1. The shampoo is not a free-for-all
That shampoo in the shower? I paid €12.99 for it and it’s made with Argan Oil.
It is not for post-gym showers. Capiche?
2. You must never leave the bathroom in a state
This means no wet towels on the floor, hair in the plughole or pee on the toilet seat.
You’ve been warned.
3. Don’t even think about leaving beard trimmings on the sink
Men, we love your beards. They’re glorious.
But leaving your little trimmings on the edge of the sink is a sin.
4. Learn that Lyons and Barry’s are not interchangeable
There needs to be a written agreement about what kind of household you’re going to be. Lyons or Barry’s? Hellman’s or Chef? Heinz or Batchelors?
Once these rules have been established, they must *never* be broken.
5. Establish “talking while in the bathroom” rules and don’t ever stray from them
If you have the kind of relationship where you feel comfortable talking to someone through the bathroom door, great!
If not, don’t you dare make small talk unless there’s a goddamned fire.
6. Remember that going to bed first does not give you permission to starfish
It’s a double bed for a reason — it’s meant for two people. If you starfish, don’t complain when your other half wakes you up to tell you to move over.
7. You can’t be stingy with wardrobe space
That means absolutely no suggestions of “How about we put your clothes in the spare room, yeah?”
Sharing is caring after all.
8. You must not watch episodes of TV shows if your OH is not present
Watching an episode of Game of Thrones when your other half is not around because you have no willpower?
RUDE, INCONSIDERATE, DESPICABLE, ETC.
Take a look at yourself.
9. Put a near empty carton of milk back in the fridge
One drop of milk left? Oh, thank you, my love.
*starts practicing voodoo*
10. Leave dirty places/cups/cutlery in places that aren’t the dishwasher
THE DISHWASHER IS CALLED THE “DISHWASHER” FOR A REASON. ARE YOU TRYING TO DRIVE ME TO DRINK?
*sigh*
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