HALLOWEEN IS JUST a fortnight away and you know what that means…
A rake of nonsensical “sexy” costumes to roll your eyes at.
So, what sexy costumes can us gals choose from this year?
1. Sexy mushroom
“Ah yes, what a sexy vegetable” — humans eating mushrooms, apparently.
2. Sexy Minion
Inevitable, really.
*sigh*
3. Sexy Pizza Rat
“What are you supposed to be?” “I’m that rat who carried the slice of pizza… but sexier.”
4. Sexy beaver
Ugh, you’re just leaving yourself open to gross double entendres if you dress as a “sexy beaver” for Christmas.
5. Sexy Caitlyn Jenner
Lads, no.
6. Sexy corn
????????
7. Sexy checkered flag
Can we spare a thought for the poor women who are forced to model these costumes, though?
8. Sexy MMA fighter
Is there a Sexy UFC Fighter costume for lads?
We didn’t think so.
9. Sexy prison inmate
Even comes with a classy ”Indecent Exposure” sign!
Oh Lordy.
10. Sexy Spongebob Squarepants fan
“What can I say? I just really love Spongebob.”
11. Sexy straight jacket
Nope, wrong on so many levels.
12. Sexy bottle of wine
It’s only a matter of time until sexy prosecco is unleashed…
13. Sexy garden gnome
AH HERE.
14. Sexy pouty goldfish
This is getting ridiculous.
15. Sexy Donald Trump
Or rather, Donna T. Rumpshaker.
Creative, we’ll give them that.
16. And finally… sexy chewing gum
Note how dead the model is behind the eyes.
SHUT IT DOWN.
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