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YOU MIGHT BE a small person, but you’ve got big problems.
The average height for a woman in Ireland is 5’4.5″, with the average height for a man clocking in at 5’10″.
If you’re below those heights, that makes you officially smaller than average – and if you are, these things just might be the bane of your life.
1. Not being able to see anything. Ever
At gigs and events, you don’t even have to be stuck behind a tall person to not be able to see. It could be anyone. Your view is guaranteed to be blocked unless you’re right at the front, because almost everyone is taller than you.
This leaves you pogoing up and down to grab a glimpse.
2. Being accused of having a Napoleon complex
If you have a temper and you are smaller than average, be prepared for a lifetime of being told you have “short man/woman syndrome” – ie, that you over-compensate for your short stature with a need for power and dominance.
Oh, really? I’m small? Thank you for informing me. It had genuinely escaped my attention for my entire life that I am smaller than others. No, really. Thanks.
Clothes are hard to find as a small person. Trousers will inevitably sag and get rolled up, and you can look like a swamped child in an ill-fitting suit.
Either get used to asking “Sorry, could you grab that for me?” or else invest in a kitchen step – because let’s face it: you are never getting up to those shelves.
Monday 23 December, 2024
Monday 23 December, 2024
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Why being a short person is the worst ever
YOU MIGHT BE a small person, but you’ve got big problems.
The average height for a woman in Ireland is 5’4.5″, with the average height for a man clocking in at 5’10″.
If you’re below those heights, that makes you officially smaller than average – and if you are, these things just might be the bane of your life.
1. Not being able to see anything. Ever
At gigs and events, you don’t even have to be stuck behind a tall person to not be able to see. It could be anyone. Your view is guaranteed to be blocked unless you’re right at the front, because almost everyone is taller than you.
Image: via 9 Gag
This leaves you pogoing up and down to grab a glimpse.
2. Being accused of having a Napoleon complex
If you have a temper and you are smaller than average, be prepared for a lifetime of being told you have “short man/woman syndrome” – ie, that you over-compensate for your short stature with a need for power and dominance.
Image: via Zimbio
WELL, THEY CAN FECK RIGHT OFF IF THEY THINK WE HAVE SHORT PERSON SYNDROME. WHO’S WITH ME?!
3. Looking ridiculous in photos with tall people
Out on a night out with your taller pals? Prepare for the tagged photos on Facebook – cos boy are they gonna suck.
Image: via Karma Decay
4. Being told you’re short
Oh, really? I’m small? Thank you for informing me. It had genuinely escaped my attention for my entire life that I am smaller than others. No, really. Thanks.
Image: via GifBase
5. Forever rolling up your trousers
Clothes are hard to find as a small person. Trousers will inevitably sag and get rolled up, and you can look like a swamped child in an ill-fitting suit.
Image: via Shutterstock
And people will shriek and hoot with disbelief when you tell them about your small feet, so it’s best to keep your tiny feet shame to yourself.
6. Extremely difficult to kiss a tall person
Kissing or going out with a taller person is like an interesting physical obstacle course, with just as much potential embarrassment.
Sometimes it’s easier to just sit down to alleviate the potential dancefloor issues involved in navigating getting up there.
Image: via Dating Fails
7. Can’t reach things
Either get used to asking “Sorry, could you grab that for me?” or else invest in a kitchen step – because let’s face it: you are never getting up to those shelves.
Image: via Daily Dawdle
8. Being used as an armrest
We’re not down there for your gratification, you know.
Er, that came out wrong.
Image: via Growth Max
We’re still waiting for that ever-promised growth spurt.
Read: Woman divorces man because of his small penis>
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short shorts teeny Titch vertically challenged