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Dublin: 10 °C Wednesday 25 December, 2024

Are You A Social Media Addict?

Take our test to see whether you have this terrible affliction.

Flickr/trekkyandy

SOCIAL MEDIA ADDICTION is the scourge of modern life. To find out whether you have been afflicted, simply answer the following questions.

Results at the bottom. Feel free to share this quiz with anyone you think may need it.

1. You are out for a nice meal in a restaurant. Do you…

A: Savour the fine food, while also enjoying an all-too-rare evening of conversation with your friends and/or family.

B: Savour the fine food and think about taking a photo, but ultimately feel too self-conscious to do anything.

C: Take photos of every course, then spend most of the rest of the meal adding filters and wondering whether to request a move to a more brightly-lit table so your followers can see better.

Flickr/SOMBILON ART, MEDIA and PHOTOGRAPHY

2. You are at home, alone. Do you…

A: Read a book, listen to music… whatever floats your boat.

B: Watch TV, and perhaps join the conversation on Twitter using relevant hashtags.

C: Spend countless hours staring in silence at your phone, framing witty tweets pitched perfectly for maximum RT-age. Eventually realise it is 2am and you should probably go to bed.

Flickr/IamJohnMichaels

3. You will be spending time in an area without 3G reception – let’s say, a relative’s house in the country. Do you…

A: Get all your emails done before you go, so you won’t need to use the internet at all.

B: Post an update about how you’re going to be “offline” for the next couple of days, but if anyone wants a hotline to the Dark Ages they can ring you.

C: Scream, curl into the foetal position, pound your little fists on the ground and refuse to leave your WiFi area.

Flickr/ken ratcliff

4. An acquaintance tells a joke. Do you…

A: Laugh.

B: Laugh, and maybe think about sharing the moment in a tweet later.

C: Feel confused about how to react because real life doesn’t have a ‘favourite’ button.

Imgur

5. You are going to the cinema with a friend. Do you…

A: Enjoy the prospect of a good film and a catch-up afterwards.

B: Post your choice of movie on Facebook and Twitter to see what people are saying about it, and/or make yourself look cultured.

C: Feel mildly panicky about spending two hours off social media. In an attempt to remedy this, dial down the brightness on your phone screen so you can check it throughout the film. Then send a slew of tweets offering your earnest opinion at five-minute intervals.

Flickr/oneselfsacrifice

6. You lose your phone. Do you…

A: Buy a new one when you get a chance

B: Buy a new one, and in the meantime post on Facebook complaining and asking people to send you their numbers.

C: Attend hospital in the belief that you have lost a limb.

Flickr/lydia_shiningbrightly

7. You notice that your number of Twitter followers has declined. Do you…

A: Ignore it, because Twitter is stupid anyway.

B: Feel secretly disappointed, but chalk it up to some kind of Twitter cleanup – they were probably just spambots.

C: Find out EXACTLY who the culprits were using Who Unfollowed Me, then embark on a tireless campaign of overly-affectionate replies and retweets until they are guilted into following you again.

Imgur

8. You are alone with your thoughts. Are they…

A: Thoughts.

B: Thoughts.

C: Potential tweets.

Flickr/cambodia4kidsorg

THE RESULTS

So how did you do?

Mostly A’s: You are most certainly not a social media addict. In fact, you may feel slightly confused and frightened at the very mention of social media. It is possible that you occasionally refer to ‘The Face Book’, and it is likely that you work in a museum or repository of ancient books.

Mostly B’s: You are an enthusiastic social media user. You’re not an addict yet, but you’d probably want to watch out. If you ever find yourself choosing home furnishings on the basis of how well they’ll Instagram, come back and take this test again.

Mostly C’s: You are a hopeless social media addict. You think in tweets, see in Instagrams, and your emotional wellbeing hangs from the number of likes on your last Facebook status.

In fact, as this is the end of this article, you’ve probably already tweeted the link and stopped reading. Snapchat, anyone?

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