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Taylor Swift's squad all wrote deeply embarrassing (and eerily similar) messages for her birthday

These are all a little…. much.

YESTERDAY TAYLOR SWIFT celebrated her 27th birthday.

And while her big day may have been overshadowed by her arch nemeiss Kanye West’s meeting with Donald Trump and her best friend Ed Sheeran’s cryptic tweeted, her squad did their utmost to make her feel special.

How, you ask? By posting gushing messages on Instagram lauding Taylor Swift for being ‘inspirational,’ ‘incredible,’ and ‘generous,’ while also being careful to pepper the posts with relatable tidbits about her fondness for baking and dance parties.

It was all a little… much.

Martha Hunt kicked things off with a post praising Taylor for her ‘resilience’ and ‘passion for life’.

But she was also careful to mention Taylor’s love of dancing and their late-night girly chats, a recurring theme in these posts.

Taylor! My life wouldn’t be the same without our spontaneous dance parties and all night conversations. I love how you never judge my moves and always teach me better ones. Your resilience and passion for life inspire me every day. HBD

Lily Aldridge, meanwhile, decided to play the “HOW DO I LOVE THEE? LET ME COUNT THE WAYS” card.

But she also got that sneaky dance mention in there ;)

Happy Birthday Taylor. There’s so many reasons I love you!!! You are my partner in crime, dance partner, someone I can talk to about anything, friend for life! But most of all I love your big beautiful heart. We love you. Lily & Dixie

Unfortunately, Karlie Kloss and Lily Aldridge did not consult one another before sharing their posts, which meant that both referred to Taylor as their ‘partner-in-crime’.

No mention of dancing from Karlie, though :(

Happiest of Birthdays to my ride or die @taylorswift I feel blessed to count you as my friend, sister and partner in crime. Can’t wait to celebrate together very soon

Gigi Hadid’s message was a little more measured if you discount her liberal use of exclamation marks.

Sidenote: are Taylor Swift’s friends legally required to mention how inspired they are by her? Can they not just fill their birthday messages with inside jokes like normal people?

 Happy Birthday to you T!! So inspired every day by what an incredible friend you are !!!!!!!! love you & celebrating with u in spirit xx

Number of adjectives Ruby Rose uses to describe Taylor Swift: 5

  • Incredible
  • Loyal
  • Loving
  • Generous
  • Amazing
What does one even begin to say about this incredible woman. Happy birthday to one of most incredible, loyal, loving and generous human beings I’ve ever met. @taylorswift you are an amazing friend and I wish you nothing but the most amazing day. You deserve so so so much joy today and forever more, Just like the joy you bring to others. Xoxo

Like Gigi Hadid, Todrick Hall decided to make a big song and dance about how inspirational Taylor is.

“Every time I’m with you I leave challenging myself to be a better me.”

Christ.

Happy Birthday to the sweetest human being I know. Every time I’m with you I leave challenging myself to be a better me. Your heart is just as big and special as your talent, and I’m proud to be your self appointed GBF #Taydrick Happy Birthday @taylorswift

Thankfully, Kennedy Rayé was on hand to hammer the, “She loves to dance and cook” point home again. Phew.

While also noting how lucky she was to be friends with Taylor.

Happy Birthday Tay! I’m so blessed to have a friend like you… one who cooks amazing chicken parmesan and allows you to dance all night in their kitchen lol You have such a beautiful spirit, and it radiates love through everything you do. Have the best day! Love you

Seriously, though – ow many dance partners does Taylor Swift have? Because Chloe Winter Keslinger (we don’t know either) is also professing to be one.

Happy Birthday to the best cat-mother, kitchen dance party partner, crime drama marathon watching buddy, FRIEND I know. @taylorswift we’ve been through a lot (and not just retro clothing phases) and there’s no one else I’d want by my side. Thank you for your friendship, sisterhood & for always casting light instead of shadows. I guess you could say I’m pretty happy you were born or whatever. LOVE YOU

I’m beginning to think Taylor Swift’s publicist sent a memo to the squad before they wrote the messages.

Her’s Fifth Harmony’s Camila Cabelo mentioning the fabled dance parties again.

Here is to the late night conversations with milk and cookies, the living room dance parties, and the tightest hugs when we haven’t seen each other for too long- and most of all to the memories we have yet to make. Here’s to an amazing friend and a magical woman, @taylorswift happy birthday linda!!!!!!

Like…………………..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY @taylorswift ! You are one of a kind. I am blessed to know you, work with you, and call you friend. Thanks for all the fun times on and off the stage. Here’s to another year filled with love, happiness, and great music! You better have an epic dance party tonight! I love you!!

To her credit, Jaime King refused to write about baking brownies or whatever, and kept her message simple.

Gosh- we sure do love you! Happy Birthday @taylorswift - kisses and more kisses. Yours- LT, JK, moi and @kyle_newman

As did poor Lily Donaldson

 Happy birthday AT. Love you mucho

The best birthday greeting, though? That would be Kevin Costner’s birthday wish to the “one and only” Taylor Swift

Oh Kevin. So thirsty.

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Author
Amy O'Connor
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