1. Runs up the stairs in the dark
Everyone knows you’re safe once you get to the top.
2. Writes “this is a nice pen” with a new pen
Or their name. Seventeen times.
3. Tries to carry 7 heavy plastic bags in one go, rather than make two trips to the car
Think of all those precious seconds and calories saved.
4. Drops their phone on their face in bed
You might even do it while reading this article.
5. Loves when there’s a bit of powder left at the end of a Cup-A-Soup
It’s just so tasty.
6. This, when they’re caught staring at someone
7. Deletes their whole password after typing one letter wrong
And then you type it wrong twice more, just to really get your rage up.
8. Panics when Word asks “do you want to save changes” even though you didn’t make any changes
What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?
9. Imagines themselves performing their favourite song to an adoring audience
In this scenario you’ve also become a master at guitar/piano.
10. Laughs instead of asking someone to repeat something a second time
11. Makes faces at babies when nobody’s looking
“I’m making faces at you baby, and there’s nothing you can do about it”.
12. Panics when the baby starts crying
“Oh NO. Walk away quickly but calmly. QUICKLY BUT CALMLY”.
13. Buys a cinema ticket, then forgets where they’ve put it when they get to the ticket checker
It was literally just in your hand.
14. Looks in every drawer and press when they check into a hotel room
15. Puts off listening to voicemails
Enough with the voicemails. NOTHING is that important.
16. Tries to tickle themselves, after reading that they can’t tickle themselves
You’re trying this right now, aren’t you?
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