DECEMBER IS HERE, and that means just one thing. ADVENT CALENDARS.
And when it comes to advent calendars, there are only nine types of people in the world. Which one are you?
1. The Advance Tester
Because it’s important to make SURE the chocolates are there. Really other people should be thanking you.
2. The YOLO
Sure the world could end tomorrow. And then chocolates 3-24 would only go to waste.
3. The Victim
Forever being abused by siblings, co-workers, spouses… the list is endless. The only solution is to keep your calendar under lock and key.
4. The Nibbler
Because there’s only one way to prolong the pleasure. And that is to control your urges. (You can also feel smug about other people.)
5. The Meal Substitute
Chocolate counts as a meal. And sure the calendar is right there.
6. The Master Criminal
Deeply satisfying. However, this role comes with potentially disastrous and relationship-ruining consequences.
7. The Aggrieved Sibling
The first rule of advent calendars: if two or more people have to share one advent calendar, there will be blood.
8. The Cruelly Deprived
There are no words for the pain these people - the offspring of well-meaning but misguided parents and grandparents - must feel. No words for what they must go through.
9. And finally, the Mission Impossible
Can you make it to Christmas Eve without your parents noticing? To do so will take diligence and genius-level deception skills. Godspeed.
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