BUTTER. THE COMMONLY accepted accompaniment to bread and toast.

Perfect with a scone or bit of brack. Best friend to mashed potato. Found on practically every sandwch.

What the world fails to realise though, is that butter is not for everyone. For some, it’s an abomination. Upsetting. Unacceptable.

This is their nightmare…

1.

This is more butter than scone. Where is the humanity?

2.

Imagine the smell of the butter melting. Imagine how soggy.

3.

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A knife that grates butter into sick little curls. Welcome to the jungle.

4.

Often, a butterphobic’s worst fear is when it it twixt another substance, like with the jam here, forming an unacceptable emulsion.

5.

And again, with the beans. What animal did this?

6.

Is that…? Yes, that’s a well of butter.

7.

See all that yellow? Butter.

8.

Oh God.

9.

Oh GOD.

10.

OH GOD!

11.

Ban this sick filth.

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