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IT’S THE BIG man Morgan Freeman’s birthday this weekend!
He’s turning 76 this year. The one thing people always say about Morgan Freeman is that they wish he could narrate their life.
His character, Red, in the classic movie The Shawshank Redemption narrates the action – and since then, Freeman has been known as a voice-over storyteller extraordinaire.
But what would it REALLY be like if Red from The Shawshank Redemption narrated our tedious lives?
Well, here’s a glimpse… Red narrates a hangover.
When you know you have to get out of bed but you’re just too hungover
Red says: “There’s a harsh truth to face. No way I’m gonna make it on the outside.”
Image: Katy Winn/AP/Press Association Images
When you step into the shower and wait… but there’s no hot water
Red says: “Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.”
Image: PBG/PBG/Empics Entertainment
When you go into the kitchen but there’s no coffee or bread left
Red says: “Every man has his breaking point.”
Image: Kin Cheung/AP/Press Association Images
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When you think about what the day might be like if you hadn’t gone out
Red says: “I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up DOES rejoice. But still, the place you live in is that much more drab and empty that they’re gone. I guess I just miss my friend.”
Image: PAUL HAWTHORNE/AP/Press Association Images
When you realise you can just order a pizza
Red says: “I find I’m so excited that I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it’s the excitement only a free man can feel.”
Image: DAMIAN DOVARGANES/AP/Press Association Images
When your friend calls to dissect the night before
Red says: “You’re gonna fit right in. Everyone in here is innocent, you know that?”
Image: LIONEL CIRONNEAU/AP/Press Association Images
When you think the hangover might be gone but it resurges
Red says: “Rehabilitated? Well, now let me see. You know, I don’t have any idea what that means.”
Image: Anthony Harvey/PA Archive/Press Association Images
When you realise this is truly an ALL-DAY hangover affair
Red says: “They send you here for life. And that’s exactly what they take.”
Image: Cosima Scavolini/LaPresse/Empics Entertainment
Actually you know what, Morgan? You can just zip it and let us suffer this hangover in silence. Thanks but no thanks.
Wednesday 6 November, 2024
Wednesday 6 November, 2024
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What would it be like if Morgan Freeman narrated your hangover?
IT’S THE BIG man Morgan Freeman’s birthday this weekend!
He’s turning 76 this year. The one thing people always say about Morgan Freeman is that they wish he could narrate their life.
His character, Red, in the classic movie The Shawshank Redemption narrates the action – and since then, Freeman has been known as a voice-over storyteller extraordinaire.
But what would it REALLY be like if Red from The Shawshank Redemption narrated our tedious lives?
Well, here’s a glimpse… Red narrates a hangover.
When you know you have to get out of bed but you’re just too hungover
Red says: “There’s a harsh truth to face. No way I’m gonna make it on the outside.”
Image: Katy Winn/AP/Press Association Images
When you step into the shower and wait… but there’s no hot water
Red says: “Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.”
Image: PBG/PBG/Empics Entertainment
When you go into the kitchen but there’s no coffee or bread left
Red says: “Every man has his breaking point.”
Image: Kin Cheung/AP/Press Association Images
When you think about what the day might be like if you hadn’t gone out
Red says: “I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up DOES rejoice. But still, the place you live in is that much more drab and empty that they’re gone. I guess I just miss my friend.”
Image: PAUL HAWTHORNE/AP/Press Association Images
When you realise you can just order a pizza
Red says: “I find I’m so excited that I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it’s the excitement only a free man can feel.”
Image: DAMIAN DOVARGANES/AP/Press Association Images
When your friend calls to dissect the night before
Red says: “You’re gonna fit right in. Everyone in here is innocent, you know that?”
Image: LIONEL CIRONNEAU/AP/Press Association Images
When you think the hangover might be gone but it resurges
Red says: “Rehabilitated? Well, now let me see. You know, I don’t have any idea what that means.”
Image: Anthony Harvey/PA Archive/Press Association Images
When you realise this is truly an ALL-DAY hangover affair
Red says: “They send you here for life. And that’s exactly what they take.”
Image: Cosima Scavolini/LaPresse/Empics Entertainment
Actually you know what, Morgan? You can just zip it and let us suffer this hangover in silence. Thanks but no thanks.
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