IT’S SAFE TO say Justin Timberlake’s latest album cycle hasn’t exactly gone to plan.

The album received mixed reviews from the majority of critics, as has the accompanying Man Of The Woods tour. He’s since moved on to a new venture, a tell-all book entitled ‘Hindsight’, which you will see him reading above.

As you’d imagine with a tell-all, Justin lets the reader on some extremely personal subjects – like the time his wife Jessica Biel told him she was pregnant. (‘Wife’ is italicised for a reason, which I will come back to.)

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“I was on the 20/20 Experience Tour when my life changed forever,” Timberlake wrote in an excerpt from the book published by E News.

There was a text from Jess, in all capital letters. It read ‘Call Me Now.’ I FaceTimed her back immediately. She answered with this look on her face, and I knew exactly what she was going to say.

Instead, she just held up the pregnancy test, and we both started bawling. I ended the tour early so I could be at home and take care of my family.”

Lovely.

In another chapter, Justin outlines more about his relationship with Britney Spears, which ended in … 2002. Sixteen years ago.

In the book, he confirms that ‘Cry Me A River’ is indeed about Britney, saying he wrote the song in two hours because he felt “scorned”. (This, despite previously denying it on camera to Barbara Walters in the now infamous interview.)

Interesting, right? Except for the fact that Justin has already gone on records numerous times to discuss their relationship at length, while, for the most part, Britney has remained quiet.

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As well as that, Britney regularly becomes the topic of conversation when Justin has something to promote. To quote 21st century poet Cardi B: “How convenient is that?”

Some media outlets ran with headlines which read: “Justin FINALLY Opens Up About His Split From Britney!” Finally? As previously outlined by Buzzfeed, Justin’s struggled to keep Britney’s name out of his mouth for promo since their split more than a decade and a half ago. He’s had digs at her career moves, subtly referred to her as a bitch during a 2013 concert, (he denied it after, but, really?) and talked relatively openly about their sex life.

But if you Google on ‘Britney on Justin’, what results are thrown up? Nothing, bar an unreleased response track called ‘Mona Lisa’, which is tame to say the least.

His Cry Me A River anecdote adds nothing to the personal or artistic narrative of his tome. You could argue that it’s not nearly salacious enough to warrant adding. So, what was the point, other than to generate internet chatter?

Alexa, play ‘Piece Of Me’, s’il vous plait.

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