New year, new you, right?

The new you may also be garnering some new enemies, if you’re not careful.

Here are all the ways your healthy carry on is infuriating your (bitter, jealous) friends…

1. Your motivational Facebook posts

They’re interrupting our telly watching and making us feel just awful about that 5th Jaffa Cake.

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Go on. Have a Jaffa Cake. You know you want to.

2. Your workout boasts

Even though you can barely lift your arms to type, you’re going to let the world know about the kettle bell class you just endured.

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3. Your cheery run down of the calories and Weight Watchers Points in everything

Oh is it that you’re having? Looks lovely but not for me. *whispers* NINE points! NINE!

Oh cheese? You lucky thing. All those calories.

The worst is when you physically remove something from somebody’s hand to inspect the nutritional content.

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STAHP IT! You’re ruining it for everyone else!

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4. Your refusal to eat anything that’s the least bit of craic

Cake in the office, sweets at the cinema, crisps in the pub.

Go on, just a TASTE! You’re not a martyr.

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5. Your constant references to things we’ve never heard of

Chia seeds, shredding, extreme juicing, #CleanEats. Whatever happened to a bit of gammon and a few spuds?

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6. Your intimate knowledge of every pound you lose or gain

For mere mortals, weight is just the difference between wearing jeans or wearing tracksuits bottoms on any given day.

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Psst if you’re staying fit/working out/getting healthy, KEEP GOING. Everyone else is just jealous.

Just keep the boasting down.

And always remember:

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Read: 8 acts of potential sabotage you face the minute you start a ‘new lifestyle plan’> 

Read: Here are all the signs that the diet starts tomorrow>

Read: 9 things that drive you completely MAD>