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Dublin: 11 °C Friday 15 November, 2024

6 ways a stranger's greeting can make you blind with rage

“Smile”.

WHEN DID WE all get so ‘friendly’ anyway?

“Hun”

The scourge of the 21st century, ‘hun’ is now the go-to greeting for gal pals, shop workers, delivery people, strangers in lifts, taxi drivers and everyone else.

Stop. Stop it.

“Pal”

Usually used with a soupçon of passive aggression, being called “pal” by someone who isn’t your pal is the verbal equivalent of a side-eye with the promise of a loaf to the head.

“Actually pal” is motive for homicide.

tumblr_mbf495Qd2d1rfduvxo1_500 Salon Salon

 ”Smile”

We haven’t carried out scientific research but we’re fairly certain that there are no recorded incidents of a stranger leering at another stranger in the street telling them to:

Smile, it might never happen.

which have resulted in actual smiles.

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“Buddy”

Same rules apply for “buddy’ as for “pal”. Buddy might even evoke a little more disdain or menace.

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“Pet”

The ultimate in condescension/nice taxi driver patter, depending on the delivery.

“Sweetheart”

The shorthand version of saying:

Do/get this for me, there’s a good girl.

Don’t even get us started on “good girl”.

roadragevenom

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Author
Emer McLysaght
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