BEDTIME. A PIECE of cake for some, but a lengthy struggle for others.
Maybe you’re one of those people who shuts off like a light the second their head hits the pillow. But maybe you need perfect silence to settle down, and the slightest sound can have you like this:
Here are some of the worst offenders.
TV noises
HAHAHAHAHA!
Oh, someone must be watching Friends.
*pewpewpewpewpew* *pew*
Video games? At THIS time of night?
Perhaps you’ll shuffle down in your slippers and be That Guy, the one that says “Can you turn it down a bit? I’m trying to sleep.”
Smoke alarm running out of batteries
This always happens just when you get to that space between dozing off and deep sleep. You’re having one of those strange dreams, when all of a sudden…
Then there’s the age-old dilemma: Do you take out the batteries, get a good night’s sleep, but risk not knowing if there’s a fire? Or leave in the batteries and be safe, but without sleep? IT ISN’T FAIR.
Washing machine spinning itself into overdrive
Someone put on the washing machine at 11pm and now it sounds like a tiny airplane taking off.
No, that’s grand, sure you don’t need to go to sleep anyway. It’s so much fun just lying here.
Banging gate
This one is particularly aggravating because you can never quite predict when the next gust of wind will come along and bang it again.
Will you have to get up to close it? Which bright spark left it open? But what if the open gate means…
Imagined (or real?!) intruders
ROBBERS! They’re definitely here, they’re definitely downstairs, and they’re definitely rootling through the kitchen cupboards.
How do you know? You heard the sound of the press door closing. YOU DID.
Crying baby
Everyone knows it’s virtually impossible for anyone, even the most steadfast of heavy sleepers, to snooze through a crying baby.
So in fairness, you’re not the only one being put out here.
Mystery noise
What IS that? It sounds like…nothing you’ve ever heard before.
Do you investigate? What if it’s a GHOST? Best stay in bed with the covers pulled up to your chin.
Snoring
Of course, if it isn’t all that, it’s the treachery of the person sleeping next to you (or indeed, in the next room over).
All the poking, prodding, and strange nose clips in the world won’t save you now. Resign yourself to your sleepless fate.
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