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If you’re not overly familiar with tennis, then it can be a tricky time as you attempt to bluff your way through it.
For those of you who are not up to speed, we have compiled a helpful list of phrases to deploy whenever you get caught watching a tennis match. You’re welcome.
Drop this casually at the start of the evening and everyone will think you’re a seasoned Wimbledon viewer.
2. “Ah, I’d challenge that call”
EMPICS Sport
EMPICS Sport
If a tennis player feels the umpire or linesman has made an incorrect call, he/she can challenge the call using Hawkeye, a fancy computer system that tracks the trajectory of the ball and can tell you whether it was bounced inside or outside the lines.
Only to be said if the ball *actually* looks like it might be out. Otherwise, you’ll look like a total tennis novice.
3. “Excellent serve.”
AP / Press Association Images
AP / Press Association Images / Press Association Images
A safe bet for whenever you’re struggling for something worthwhile to say.
4. ”What an ace.”
http://vine.co/v/OdQPYKT26dA
An ace is what you call it when a serve goes unreturned. (See above.)
They’re nearly always impressive. However, some players use aces a little too liberally (see: John Isner, Ivo Karlovic) and that’s no fun for anyone, so make sure to reserve your praise in those situations.
5. “This is like watching Isner play Mahut!”
PA Archive / Press Association Images
PA Archive / Press Association Images / Press Association Images
In 2010, John Isner and Nicolas Mahut played the longest match in tennis history. (It went to 70-68 in the fifth set as tiebreakers are not allowed in the fifth set.)
If a fifth set is running particularly long, reference Isner and Mahut, and you will earn the respect of tennis anoraks everywhere.
6. “Come on, Tim!”
It’s funny because Tim Henman doesn’t play tennis anymore. Ha ha.
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This line suggests you are familiar enough with tennis to (a) remember Tim Henman’s tennis exploits and (b) make inside jokes about it.
Sure, you’re a gas ticket.
7. “Stan Wawrinka’s backhand, am I right?”
Andy Brownbill
Andy Brownbill
The backhand is one of the hardest shots to master in tennis.
http://vine.co/v/OQKKVVtxDpB
And Stan Wawrinka, who recently won the French Open, is widely regarded as having maybe the best in the game right now.
To be said with an air of wonder and amazement.
8. “He/she didn’t even try to make that shot!”
JONATHAN BRADY
JONATHAN BRADY
Sometimes when watching tennis, it can appear as though a tennis player hasn’t bothered his/her arse to make a shot.
This is, of course, not the case, but there’s nothing more satisfying as a tennis fan than pretending you’re superior to the athlete on the court.
See also: “Sure, I’d have got that myself.”
9. “Lovely passing shot.”
A passing shot is a return that whizzes past the opponent after he/she has approached the net.
Cue tennis players looking back longingly behind them.
http://vine.co/v/OxuHpJ3260d
Best said while stroking your chin like a true tennis scholar.
Saturday 9 November, 2024
Saturday 9 November, 2024
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11 essential phrases for bluffing your way through Wimbledon
IT’S JULY AND Wimbledon fever is taking over.
If you’re not overly familiar with tennis, then it can be a tricky time as you attempt to bluff your way through it.
For those of you who are not up to speed, we have compiled a helpful list of phrases to deploy whenever you get caught watching a tennis match. You’re welcome.
1. “Pimm’s anyone?”
Pimm’s is the drink associated with Wimbledon.
Drop this casually at the start of the evening and everyone will think you’re a seasoned Wimbledon viewer.
2. “Ah, I’d challenge that call”
If a tennis player feels the umpire or linesman has made an incorrect call, he/she can challenge the call using Hawkeye, a fancy computer system that tracks the trajectory of the ball and can tell you whether it was bounced inside or outside the lines.
Only to be said if the ball *actually* looks like it might be out. Otherwise, you’ll look like a total tennis novice.
3. “Excellent serve.”
A safe bet for whenever you’re struggling for something worthwhile to say.
4. ”What an ace.”
http://vine.co/v/OdQPYKT26dA
An ace is what you call it when a serve goes unreturned. (See above.)
They’re nearly always impressive. However, some players use aces a little too liberally (see: John Isner, Ivo Karlovic) and that’s no fun for anyone, so make sure to reserve your praise in those situations.
5. “This is like watching Isner play Mahut!”
In 2010, John Isner and Nicolas Mahut played the longest match in tennis history. (It went to 70-68 in the fifth set as tiebreakers are not allowed in the fifth set.)
If a fifth set is running particularly long, reference Isner and Mahut, and you will earn the respect of tennis anoraks everywhere.
6. “Come on, Tim!”
It’s funny because Tim Henman doesn’t play tennis anymore. Ha ha.
This line suggests you are familiar enough with tennis to (a) remember Tim Henman’s tennis exploits and (b) make inside jokes about it.
Sure, you’re a gas ticket.
7. “Stan Wawrinka’s backhand, am I right?”
The backhand is one of the hardest shots to master in tennis.
http://vine.co/v/OQKKVVtxDpB
And Stan Wawrinka, who recently won the French Open, is widely regarded as having maybe the best in the game right now.
To be said with an air of wonder and amazement.
8. “He/she didn’t even try to make that shot!”
Sometimes when watching tennis, it can appear as though a tennis player hasn’t bothered his/her arse to make a shot.
This is, of course, not the case, but there’s nothing more satisfying as a tennis fan than pretending you’re superior to the athlete on the court.
See also: “Sure, I’d have got that myself.”
9. “Lovely passing shot.”
A passing shot is a return that whizzes past the opponent after he/she has approached the net.
Cue tennis players looking back longingly behind them.
http://vine.co/v/OxuHpJ3260d
Best said while stroking your chin like a true tennis scholar.
10. “You cannot be serious!”
A reference to McEnroe’s infamous on-court outburst in 1981.
Best said when someone on court looks like they’re getting a bit testy with the umpire.
11. “Oh Sue.”
Sue Barker is a tennis institution and a dote.
Fawn over her whenever she’s on screen and your tennis-watching pals will count you as one of their own.
<3
This lad got ‘Gary Lineker shags crisps’ tattooed on his arse and immediately regretted it >
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dummy's guide Sport Tennis Wimbledon