BIKINI WAXES ARE, by their very nature, unpleasant at best, and agonising at worst.
Most of us have at least one horror story, and if you don’t, you very likely have a mate who does.
I have one. Shocking, says you.
Without disclosing too many indelicate details, I’ll just say that it involved a very inexperienced therapist, a surplus amount of wax, and a pair of scissors.
I’ll also just add that the scissors was required to cut gingerly through the wax which had been applied so liberally it had rendered the body part it was covering fairly useless; I’ll leave the rest to your imagination.
Seeing a stranger, to whom you’ve entrusted your nether regions, approach with a scissors is a surreal experience.
And not one I ever want to repeat.
Bikini waxes; when they’re bad, they’re bad, but even when they’re grand, they’re not great.
And Twitter perfectly illustrates this whenever it turns its attention to the topic.
1. Remind us again why we do this.
Scheduling a bikini wax feels like scheduling my own execution. Only I'm alive and in agony at the end.
— Mrs. Fucking McKenna (@FuckingAdorable) March 14, 2011
2. Expert agony though, to be fair.
Can't believe I'm paying someone to put me through agony #bikiniwax
— Jessie Buller (@JessieBuller) August 24, 2013
3. Did she actually delight or were you just hallucinating with pain?
The girl who just my bikini wax seemed to delight in my agony. She kept looking at my anguished expression with wide-eyed glee. Bitch.
— Rock Geek Girl (@RockGeekGirl) January 10, 2015
4. And then there’s the people who have endured one with one.
Id rather have 90000 hangovers than go for a bikini wax again 😭😭😭 it's fkn agony
— Absss (@AbigailHarkness) August 3, 2016
5. May as well double down, amirite?
Today was day 1 in a series of root canal appointments. Since I'm already in agony, I can think of no better time to get a bikini wax.
— Jenn (Jay) Palumbo (@jennpal) June 17, 2016
6. This is a public service announcement.
Message for everyone: never ever have a bikini wax #agony
— Bethan Griffiths💋 (@95_bethanx) October 20, 2015
7. Oh, joyous.
female solidarity was out of the window today,maybe beauty therapist was peed off she was working 2day #waxfromhell #ouch
— Pooja Sharma-Jones (@Poojipants) March 29, 2013
8. Especially when they approach you with a pair of scissors.
nothing worse than an inexperienced waxer #waxfromhell
— lynette (@lpnette) May 3, 2012
9. Gotta love those pamper sessions.
Having spa day at the hands of a sadist. #bikiniwaxfromhell #ineedadrink
— Lori Dyan (@LoriDyan) August 14, 2010
10. But the thing is, you probably will go there again.
the woman at the salon spilled wax on my leg and ass by accident. #mlia #bikiniwaxnightmare never going there again.
— Emily Daniels (@EmilyxDaniels) July 1, 2012
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