AS SOMEONE WHO grew up with cats, I never understood people’s dislike for them.
When words like ‘sneaky’, ‘sly’ and ‘evil’ were bandied around, I pictured the three ridiculous furballs who called my family home theirs, and struggled to reconcile the two.
Sneaky? Sly? Evil? Those terms suggested agency and our cats spent the vast majority of their time sleeping. Takes a certain kind of evil to bring down a housing estate when you’re 16-hours deep into your latest nap.
What I found hilarious about the whole cat vs dog debate was that while there were plenty of reasons to dislike cats, those who did rarely hit upon them.
And then I realised that you needed to actually share a living space with a cat to know its true shortcomings.
Evil? Hardly. Petty? Clumsy? Sometimes incontinent? Sure.
So, here are 13 tweets that you’ll relate to if you love your cat with all your heart, but know it can be an utter asshole at times.
1. Mervin, for God’s sake.
Thanks for shitting on my bed Merlin.. just what I needed today. #ihatemycat
— KENYA🇰🇪 (@KenyaBliss) January 31, 2013
2. Yeah Leo, get off your damn cross.
Think I need to show Leo some photos of third world country cats, show him he's not REALLY starving and should moan less 😠 #ihatemycat
— Bridget Porter (@bridget_porter) February 24, 2015
3. Yeah, they’ll do that.
My cat gives me this mean look that makes me contemplate why I'm still living... #ihatemycat
— Jacob Morris (@Jacob_T_Morris) October 15, 2014
4. That’s why she hasn’t taught it to you though.
I wish I new how to tell my cat to fuck off in her language. #ihatemycat
— Jackson weeks (@JWeeks87) January 27, 2013
5. She probably didn’t do it on purpose, but she’ll definitely keep you guessing.
Came home to my favorite shot glass shattered on the floor...Sparknuts is just asking to be brought to the shelter #ihatemycat 😾😑👎
— RockstarzZz (@RockstaRoxyyyy) November 14, 2013
6. Who’s really to blame here though?
I haven't cleaned my cats litter box in a while so she took a shit on my bed.🙅 #ihatemycat
— Ashly Whittington (@ashly_whitt) November 7, 2013
7. We mean, who knows?
So what exactly does it mean when your cat drags your sports bra into her water dish? Asking for a friend. #thefriendisme #mycatisweird
— rare lobster energy (@rarebluelobster) June 20, 2013
8. And then there’s that.
i just heard my cat fart from across the room. #idontlikemycat
— bethany martha. (@bethanymartha_) June 15, 2010
9. Selfish? Sure.
So I was making an egg n bacon s/w and my cat jumped up, ate the bacon and tried eating the whole egg still in the shell #whatismycat
— Katie Prior (@KatieePrior) May 31, 2014
10. Embarrassing? Always.
my cat is such a fatty.. she tried to eat her own vomit today... TWO HOURS AFTER I CLEANED IT UP AND THREW IT IN THE TRASH. #whatismycat
— Chrissy Weiner (@chrissyweiner) February 9, 2012
11. Seriously, get it together.
Nothing like waking up to FUCKING CAT SHIT IN MY TUB. #fuckoffcat
— shanandler bong (@shandykeegan) October 26, 2013
12. It’s part of their charm… in a way.
My cat's mission in life: Leave no cup unspilled. #cats #fuckoffcat
— Jake Birkline (@Unifying_Theory) September 10, 2012
13. Yeah, what’s with this?
My cat likes to steal full rolls of toilet paper and shred them under the couch. #fuckoffcat #forreelllldo
— Nick (@NickMartin907) March 1, 2012
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