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VOLCANOS IN MULLINGAR? All of our childhood fears realised. And so, here are some of the top horrors that tormented us when we were small, starting of course with…
Volcanos
Who remembers where they were the day someone referred to The Sugar Loaf as ‘a volcano’?
“BUT WE LIVE IN IRELAND” you shrieked inwardly. “MAMMY SAID THERE WERE NO VOLCANOS”.
Cue two years of nightmares and a pathological fear of Wicklow.
And, by extension, lava
Your logic: Lava destroys everything in its path – including you – as it flows inexorably towards your home from the Sugar Loaf, no matter where you are in the country.
Solid logic, to be fair.
A seemingly harmless game of The Floor Is Lava was always tinged with genuine horror, as you plotted how you would escape should the imaginary ever become a reality. Those cushions would burn. BURN.
Quicksand
Quicksand was everywhere as a child. Every. Where. A hidden threat waiting to suck you under at every turn with its scratchy yet fluid fingers of doom.
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Disney films
Touted as movies filled with childhood wonder, many Disney films cause adults to shudder in horror to this day.
Exhibit A: Snow White in the dark forest
Exhibit B: The horrifying acid elephants in Dumbo
Exhibit C: The child catcher Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
Farm safety videos
If falling into the slurry pit or flying your kite into a power line wasn’t going to get you, then the sheep-worrying dog was.
The presents he brought were fantastic. But having to sit on a strange magic man’s knee in a large cotton wool-covered cardboard box at the back of a Quinnsworth while his beard slipped suspiciously down his chin? Horrifying.
Let’s be honest, nobody wearing a balaclava is up to any good. Unless they’re climbing Everest for charity. Childhood fears surrounding balaclavas involved bad people coming to bludgeon your parents and stealing you away to work in a glue factory. Or some kind of terror factory. Maybe not glue. Maybe a child killing factory.
Tuesday 24 December, 2024
Tuesday 24 December, 2024
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7 childhood fears you might never get over
THIS HEADLINE FROM today’s Irish Times struck fear into our hearts and minds:
VOLCANOS IN MULLINGAR? All of our childhood fears realised. And so, here are some of the top horrors that tormented us when we were small, starting of course with…
Volcanos
Who remembers where they were the day someone referred to The Sugar Loaf as ‘a volcano’?
“BUT WE LIVE IN IRELAND” you shrieked inwardly. “MAMMY SAID THERE WERE NO VOLCANOS”.
Cue two years of nightmares and a pathological fear of Wicklow.
And, by extension, lava
Your logic: Lava destroys everything in its path – including you – as it flows inexorably towards your home from the Sugar Loaf, no matter where you are in the country.
Solid logic, to be fair.
A seemingly harmless game of The Floor Is Lava was always tinged with genuine horror, as you plotted how you would escape should the imaginary ever become a reality. Those cushions would burn. BURN.
Quicksand
Quicksand was everywhere as a child. Every. Where. A hidden threat waiting to suck you under at every turn with its scratchy yet fluid fingers of doom.
Disney films
Touted as movies filled with childhood wonder, many Disney films cause adults to shudder in horror to this day.
Exhibit A: Snow White in the dark forest
Exhibit B: The horrifying acid elephants in Dumbo
Exhibit C: The child catcher Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
Farm safety videos
If falling into the slurry pit or flying your kite into a power line wasn’t going to get you, then the sheep-worrying dog was.
Santa
The presents he brought were fantastic. But having to sit on a strange magic man’s knee in a large cotton wool-covered cardboard box at the back of a Quinnsworth while his beard slipped suspiciously down his chin? Horrifying.
Balaclavas
Let’s be honest, nobody wearing a balaclava is up to any good. Unless they’re climbing Everest for charity. Childhood fears surrounding balaclavas involved bad people coming to bludgeon your parents and stealing you away to work in a glue factory. Or some kind of terror factory. Maybe not glue. Maybe a child killing factory.
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childhood fears lava the floor is lava