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UNDOUBTEDLY, THE INTERNET has changed our lives for the better.
Where else would I buy cheap contact lenses and clothes that I will inevitably never wear?
Yes, the internet has made my life, and the lives of many others, almost too convenient.
Except, that is, when it comes to deliveries.
I’ve resigned myself to knowing that my epitaph will read: “Here lies Fionnuala, who died trying to reorganise delivery of her *extremely urgent* ASOS package.”
No matter the courier company or the contents of the package, I’ve managed to make a haims of it at some point in my life.
The constant refresh of tracking your parcel
Why. Don’t. You. Just. Arrive. Already?!
Feeling like a prisoner in your own home patiently awaiting it’s arrival
When ASOS have you under house arrest …
“Any plans for the day?”
“Not really, no.”
Why do I always say I’m going to be home knowing full well I won’t be?
Stop lying to yourself and the DPD man.
You work 9 – 5, there’s as much of a chance of you being home to sign for something as there is of you walking on the moon.
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Begging your housemates to make themselves available to sign for you instead
They have lives too, y’know.
Still, that’s not going to stop from getting in a huff when they don’t DROP EVERYTHING to ensure your Zara parcel makes it to the door.
SO selfish.
When you actually are at home and the delivery person doesn’t knock loud enough/ring the bell
I’m sure there are worse things you can find shoved in your letterbox than a “sorry we missed you!” slip from An Post.
But it’s certainly up there.
*very Joey from Friends voice* “I WAS HERE THE WHOOOOOOLE TIME!”
Calling to your neighbour after they successfully delivered it to them and not you
“Hi! It’s Paul, right? Sure we haven’t spoken since we had that gaff and you called the guards on us … How’s things?”
Attempting to rearrange delivery
… And realising that the several ‘customer service’ numbers listed on the courier’s website are all probably connected to string cans on the plains of Mordor.
Inevitably having to collect from a depot
Surely this is the real definition of the Walk Of Shame?
Google-mapping where this faraway destination is – often with an address at the Back Arse Of Nowhere, Dublin 11.
Next day delivery, me hoop.
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Sunday 24 November, 2024
Sunday 24 November, 2024
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Every absolute nightmare involved in getting a delivery
UNDOUBTEDLY, THE INTERNET has changed our lives for the better.
Where else would I buy cheap contact lenses and clothes that I will inevitably never wear?
Yes, the internet has made my life, and the lives of many others, almost too convenient.
Except, that is, when it comes to deliveries.
I’ve resigned myself to knowing that my epitaph will read: “Here lies Fionnuala, who died trying to reorganise delivery of her *extremely urgent* ASOS package.”
No matter the courier company or the contents of the package, I’ve managed to make a haims of it at some point in my life.
The constant refresh of tracking your parcel
Why. Don’t. You. Just. Arrive. Already?!
Feeling like a prisoner in your own home patiently awaiting it’s arrival
When ASOS have you under house arrest …
“Any plans for the day?”
“Not really, no.”
Why do I always say I’m going to be home knowing full well I won’t be?
Stop lying to yourself and the DPD man.
You work 9 – 5, there’s as much of a chance of you being home to sign for something as there is of you walking on the moon.
Begging your housemates to make themselves available to sign for you instead
They have lives too, y’know.
Still, that’s not going to stop from getting in a huff when they don’t DROP EVERYTHING to ensure your Zara parcel makes it to the door.
SO selfish.
When you actually are at home and the delivery person doesn’t knock loud enough/ring the bell
I’m sure there are worse things you can find shoved in your letterbox than a “sorry we missed you!” slip from An Post.
But it’s certainly up there.
*very Joey from Friends voice* “I WAS HERE THE WHOOOOOOLE TIME!”
Calling to your neighbour after they successfully delivered it to them and not you
“Hi! It’s Paul, right? Sure we haven’t spoken since we had that gaff and you called the guards on us … How’s things?”
Attempting to rearrange delivery
… And realising that the several ‘customer service’ numbers listed on the courier’s website are all probably connected to string cans on the plains of Mordor.
Inevitably having to collect from a depot
Surely this is the real definition of the Walk Of Shame?
Google-mapping where this faraway destination is – often with an address at the Back Arse Of Nowhere, Dublin 11.
Next day delivery, me hoop.
DailyEdge is on Snapchat! Tap the button below to add!
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An Post boohoo courier service Couriers Delivery missguided next day delivery package parcel Post Office where is it