ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER chance for Dermot Bannon to snoop around a rich person’s gaff on Incredible Homes.

This week, DB headed to London, where he reminisced on his time at college in the back of an Uber (we’ve all been there, in fairness.)

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As it turns out, he was a crazy fresher just like the rest of us – when he wasn’t at lectures, he frequently went out … To look at the architecture of Lloyd’s Bank. 

I had my little book of architectural gems in London. I used to get on the tube and go explore for the day.”

He was delighted then to be invited to peruse a townhouse mansion in Mayfair, one of the most expensive gaffs on the London market right now, costing £32 million. 

"Under no circumstances are you to touch this door with your poor people hands, Mr. Bannon."

Each door in the place cost £11,000, with the handles costing £900 on top of that. Now might be the time to have a look for that Communion money your parents set aside.

The house is referred to as an iceberg home, meaning that there’s even more to it underground, including an indoor swimming pool and a club room.

Dermot couldn’t help himself when it came to testing out the Chinese silk floors in his socks.

"Ah yes, I love the feel of capitalism between my toes."

Listen, good luck getting fake tan mousse out of that carpet, that all I’ll say. 

Developer Kam Babaee explained that the house’s purpose was to make anyone feel like a billionaire, even if they’d lost all their money in the office that day. Would LOVE to relate, TBH.

Then, things got a bit on the nose.

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Kam explained that each room has its own signature scent, having spent £32,000 on Jo Malone products. That is a LOT of Brown Thomas vouchers.

Dermot: “You spent £32,000 on soap and smelly things?

Kam: “Absolutely, you have to.”

Dermo's not a fan of wood sage and sea salt, seemingly RTÉ RTÉ

Naturally, Twitter was agog at the admission.

The obscene wealth on show didn’t even impress Dermot that much. You know what did though? The boiler(s). Literally.

"Look at this stuff, isn't it neat!?" RTÉ RTÉ

This is incredible. Two boilers! These people will never have to have a night without heating!”

The joys.

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