FESTIVAL SEASON CAN be a bit of a drag for some. Are you one of those who…
1. Resents the fun
HOW DO PEOPLE FIND THIS FUN?
2. Secretly feel smug when it’s lashing and you’re at home on the sofa
3. You absolutely despise the fact that you’ve to pay €200 to see one band you like
4. Who has even HEARD of those bands?
5. Mud, festival loos, the crowds, the shite watery beer… WHY
6. The thought of sleeping in a tent makes your skin crawl
You’ll have the hotel room, thanks.
7. You secretly pity people going off to a festival while pretending you’re totally jealous of all the craic they’ll have
Oh yeah, have fun washing your hair with bottled water and a hangover.
8. The craic = some lad shouting Alan at 4am in the morning
9. If you want to be near the front for your favourite band you’ve to wait HOURS without so much as a wee
Move at your peril. Oh what fun.
10. Wellies are simply the worst footwear to ever exist, even over crocs
NO amount of spotty Dunnes patterns can help them.
11. Did you mention the crowds?
The trek home from any festival, be it bus or beer-reeking car, is basically your seventh circle of hell.
12. Festival fashion articles will be the end of you
Write one more, we dare you.
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