ANOTHER WEEK, ANOTHER chance for maitre d’ Mateo to shoot his Cupid’s arrow at promising couples in the First Dates Ireland restaurant, before they inevitably make an injury claim against him.

Last night’s episode had me questioning whether the producers were on the drink while matching up the daters, what with the large age gaps and clashing personalities that featured.

First up, we had Tuey and Seán. Tuey is an English teacher who also enjoys recreationally making cakes, naming them and eating them with strangers. Listen, to each their own.

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Meanwhile, singing tour guide Seán turned up to film his VT in the most haunting Humpty Dumpty costume I’ve ever seen.

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There was also the question of his hair growth. Seriously, does he shower with Miracle-Gro or what?

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What seemed like a doomed encounter from the off ended up going reasonably well, perhaps in part to Tuey’s conversation cards that she brought with her. Questions included: “what would you do if you found out your partner was a serial killer?” Insightful, for sure.

And speaking of, remember Killian from last year’s series?

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Last year, I specifically asked that he be brought back for the next series, so big up COCO Television for making my dreams come true. Killian was christened as one of the most awkward daters to ever step through the doors of the Gibson Hotel, cinching it with the classic line: “Ted Bundy’s got nothing on me.” 

Yeah, not great now TBH. Anyway, Killian decided to give it another go, despite admitting his “street cred was in the gutter” after his last outing.

With his a-game “isteach sa phóca”, he was paired up with Derry girl Danielle.

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Unfortunately, it didn’t work out: Danielle was looking for someone more Jason Mamoa-esque and someone who … doesn’t eat Christmas dinner alone. Can you blame a man for wanting to watch Willie Wonka in peace?

The drama didn’t end there though. Karl and Kristina seemed like a match made in heaven. They both did MMA! They worked for the same gym company! They were on the same bus route!

And yet, it was not to be.

Despite showing initially seeming interested, Kristina was put out that Karl didn’t ask her about her native Russia, and was nonplussed with his choice of date attire.

Twitter had a LOT of opinions on it, but we’ll let you make up your own minds …

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There was some success among the daters – Serdzan and James got on like two respective houses on fire, while Martin and Chancelle even met up again for a work do of hers. Can you blame her? The man’s been to Eurovision with CHRIS DORAN. He’s practically royalty. 

If you’re keen to see what the daters got up to after, you can do so by watching below or by clicking here. Don’t worry, Karl got his moth in the end. Cough cough,

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