1. When you’re single and getting ready for the night out, pre-drinking in the gaff is done on your time
Your only deadline is when the drink runs out or you’re comically late.
2. When you’re in a couple, suddenly your other half’s idea of when you should be leaving also matters
“Oh, wait, you don’t want to leave at 11pm? I had never considered this an option.”
Ah, diplomacy.
3. When you’re single, you’re more than likely going to start the night out off with just your group of friends
4. When you’re in a couple, a strange merging of two different friend groups must take place
A wonderful synergy of two friend groups in the wilds of the pub.
5. Single people can move around the pub with the freedom to talk shite to anyone they like
6. When you’re in a couple, you can still do this but both of you will throw each other a nod every half hour or so
7. When you’re single, doing shots at the bar has a 90% chance of happening after 12pm
8. When you’re in a couple, you really have to think twice before accepting that Jager
“Is this worth it?” It all comes down whether it’s a “big” night or not.
9. When you’re single, the chances of getting the shift are always up in the air
There is a buzz of the will it/won’t it all night long.
10. But when you’re in a couple, you are guaranteed to get the shift with your other half
^like that, except with serious alcohol breath
11. When you’re single, the last dregs of the dancefloor at 3am is a perfectly acceptable place to be
12. When you’re in a couple, anything after 2.30am seems like the last days of Rome
“Why are we still here? This is madness.”
13. When you’re single, you have the choice of any food you want after
Oh yes, you are not tied to anyone or anything. The fast food world is your oyster.
14. When you’re in a couple, one person gets to choose their food and the other kind of has to go along with it
Laziness will take over as you don’t want to walk somewhere else and you will end up having your fourth choice post-pints meal. It must be true love if you’re sacrificing that kebab you wanted.
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