IN CASE YOU missed it, Matt Le Blanc has called time on his presenting role with Top Gear. He’s found the long amounts of time spent filming in the UK hard and he wants to spend more time with his family which is fair enough.
The question on everyone’s lips is who should replace him? We have a few suggestions.
1. Danny Healy Rae
Given that Danny Healy Rae doesn’t believe in climate change, he should have no issue driving fast cars that consume petrol at a rate of knots around Co. Kerry. He could start a service to drive people home from the pubs in a Bugatti.
2. Michael D. Higgins
Would Miggeldy be able to see over the dashboard of most cars? No probably not. Does that mean he shouldn’t be considered for the job? Absolutely not. He’d be just delighted to be doing it.
3. Dustin the Turkey
While I’m very aware that puppets cannot drive, I think we should consider introducing our friends across the water to our beloved turkey. I’m sure we can work out a system for the pedals later.
4. Roy Keane
The Irish national team aren’t really doing much this summer considering we’re not in the World Cup. Keane is only the assistant manager as well so he can’t be that busy. We smell a match made in heaven…
5. Michelle from Derry Girls
We’re sure Michelle is trustworthy enough to be given responsibility over a large amount of expensive cars without anything going awry. Plus we’re sure she’d drag the wee English lad with her which should make for very entertaining watching.
6. The Happy Pear Twins
We can inflict them on the Brits instead and that’s all I have to say on the matter.
7. Aisling Bea
The woman can do absolutely anything and you know you want to hear what she thinks about autonomous cars or doing mad cap challenges like driving across the desert. Go on.
8. Nikita from Tallfornia
She’s kept the head down since she left Tallafornia but we feel that this could be a great gig for her. She’s no longer 19 so she should know more than Cormac assumed. Plus would the Brits understand her accent? There’s only one way to find out.
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