IRISH GRANDADS ARE a lovely bunch. They absolutely love…

1. Long-winded, inappropriate jokes

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GRANDPA NO

- You at every family gathering.

2. Waking up at 6am

Why do they feel the need to get up so early? We’ll never know, but that porridge isn’t going to make itself.

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3. These exact trousers

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4. With this exact jumper

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5. Combing their hair

Well, what’s left of it. It has to be PERFECT.

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6. A good suit of a Sunday

If you turn up to mass in anything other a full suit, you may as well just spit on the replica of our Lord Jesus Christ.

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7. Dancing with any woman who’ll have him

He doesn’t discriminate, once he can have a bop.

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8. Slipping grown grandchildren a fiver

Go get a few sweets now won’t you?

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9. Snoozing in front of the telly

Usually when the horses are on.

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10. Building stuff

Whatever it is, if you buy it instead of building it from scratch, you’re a wimp.

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11. This with dinner

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Well, that or a pint of Beamish if he’s let.

12. Singing, unprompted

I suppose we can have a sing song grandad…

13. Stories about 1916

His da was fighting at the GPO, didn’t you know?

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14. Complete opposition to technology

Here’s a room full of people grandad has ever picked up his phone for:

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