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Let there be no talk of 'clean eating' on this Pancake Tuesday, the most sacred of all days

Sugar and golden syrup or NOTHING AT ALL.

USED TO BE that Pancake Tuesday was a joyful, sugary day of breakfast for dinner. But that has been changed utterly with the emergence of ‘clean eating’.

All of a sudden people are trying to ‘clean’ up Pancake Tuesday with protein and buckwheat and banana mush, peddling healthy alternatives to the simple delight of a pancake.

But it will not stand. The people are fighting back.

Today, on Pancake Tuesday, let there be no talk of ‘clean eating’ and ‘guilt free’. Let there just be pancakes, sweet and lovely.

The whole point of Pancake Tuesday was to use up all the fat in the house before the ‘fasting period’ of Lent

That’s literally how it began. It’s allowed.

It’s practically a national holiday

The level of excitement over having breakfast for dinner on a Tuesday in February is one of the only pure things left in the world. Don’t ruin that for people.

You have a whole 40 days now to gorge yourself on protein powder, if you wish

It can be your Lenten promise for the year. You don’t even have to break it on Sundays or St Patrick’s Day like everybody else does. You can have protein powder for breakfast, dinner and tea, if you want it!

Besides, there is only One True Pancake

Why mess with a good thing?

Eggs, flour, milk. Topped with sugar or butter or golden syrup or a squeeze of lemon. Nutella if you’re fancy. Done.

So this year, give Pancake Tuesday the respect it deserves

Eat a pancake. Enjoy the pancake. Do not accept poor imitations. Love the pancake for what it really is.

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