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Dublin: 5 °C Sunday 22 December, 2024

8 things you know to be true if you're a very light sleeper

Waking up at even the smallest noise is a living hell.

IT’S SAFE TO say that the heatwave is well and truly underway in Ireland which means many things.

One of these things is that it’s incredibly difficult to sleep and you’re taking your life into your hands by leaving the window open. You won’t get a breeze and you risk waking up to an infestation of midges in your room.

This does not bode well for you if like me, you’re a light sleeper. The struggles we face in the light sleepers community are real and annoying. Here are just 8 of them.

1. Getting to sleep is impossible

Your head is buzzing with thoughts of the day and thoughts of tomorrow and thoughts of the future. Your head is so full of thoughts that it’s actually impossible to sleep in the first place. You cannot win.

2. Once you’re asleep you wake up VERY easily

Was that someone CONTEMPLATING making a noise? Is that A HINT of natural light? Well it’s too late now because I’m AWAKE and everything is ruined.

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3. You’re not adverse to a bit of sleep walking

Your mother describes you as a ‘fitful sleeper’ whereas everyone else will describe you as ‘an absolute liability’. You’ve woken up in nearly all the rooms in your house and may have found yourself making yourself food in your sleep.

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4. You’ve managed to sort your life out through sleep talking

You’ve had entire conversations with yourself, given yourself the best advice and sorted out all your problems. All of course while being asleep so you can’t ever follow the amazing advice you gave yourself.

5. Your dreams are more intense than the average workout

When you do manage to fall asleep your brain decides to take you on a wild ride through your subconscious. It’s somehow more intense than Inception and makes even less sense. Why is your childhood best friend now a judge sentencing you to life in prison for not sharing your homework with her? Who knows.

6. Festivals are an absolute battle.

Never mind that you’re sleeping on the ground, tents aren’t really known for their sound proofing qualities. Earplugs don’t work and you don’t want to waste your phone battery trying to listen to music. So you just like there, angry and exhausted.

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7. You’re obsessed with tracking your sleep

Getting a FitBit was the worst thing that’s ever happened to you because now you can see how little deep sleep you get. The graph is more active than your actual love life which is also depressing.

8. You never get enough sleep anyway so why bother?

You could get 10 hours of sleep every night and it still wouldn’t be enough because as the old saying goes ‘quality over quantity’. We’re doomed to crap sleep forever.

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