SURE, IT WOULD be wonderful to find a guaranteed way to make periods less stressful, but this… this is probably not it.

Mensez Mensez

Last Friday, screengrabs from a Facebook page called ‘Mensez’ started being shared across social media – the page advertised a new invention by Wichita chiropractor Dr Dan Dopps:

A revolutionary safer solution for women to control their periods without the need for tampons, pads, vag cups, or period panties. Mensez is a natural combination of amino acids and oil in a lipstick applicator that is applied to the lips downunder during the period.

It causes them to stick together, strong enough to prevent leakage, that is until the user urinates. The urine instantly unsticks the labia and allows everything to wash out into the toilet.

Facebook / Thea Butler Facebook / Thea Butler / Thea Butler

So basically, this guy wants you to glue your ladyparts shut during your period. Erm…

People flocked to the page to tell Dopps he didn’t appear to know a lot about the female anatomy OR menstruation (the vagina and the urethra are two different things, fact fans). Dopps’ response to one commenter inspired little confidence:

You as a woman should have come up with a better solution than diapers and plugs, but you didn’t Reason being women are focused on and distracted by your period 25% of the time, making them far less productive than they could be.

Mensez Mensez

Oh dear. We might need a little Mensez on our eyeballs here to stop them from rolling right out of our skulls.

Many people cried ‘hoax’ after screengrabs from the Facebook page went viral – and you would think so, wouldn’t you? It’s just too much. ‘Mensez’/ ‘men says’? But no.

In an interview with Forbes magazine, Dopps revealed that he had been granted a patent for the product in early January.

He told writer Kavin Senapathy that Mensez had simply been misunderstood:

It will be thoroughly tested and improved. It makes more sense than putting the plug up there… We’re using the vagina like a bladder, just like tampons do.

‘Kay!

The Mensez Facebook page has since disappeared (Dopps says it was “hacked by a prankster”) but the website is still up – whether the product will ever appear on the market remains to be seen.

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