YOU MIGHT THINK the young people of Ireland are incorrigible mad yokes with an unending thirst for all sorts of unhealthy things, but you’d be wrong.
What they’re really passionate about is this.
Yeah. Mooju milk, in all its chocolatey/banana-y/strawberry forms.
It’s the preferred tipple of students and GAA heads across the country
Hurl/kit bag in one hand, Mooju in the other. That’s the way.
You feel good about yourself drinking it because of all that protein and calcium
Your mam wouldn’t be mad at you for having a bit of Mooju, you know? It’s almost virtuous.
But suspect there has to be something extra in it for it to taste that good
It’s glorified milk. Why do people have full blown addictions to it? There’s something they’re not telling us! (Yes, we’re Mooju truthers.)
There’s a full on rush to the shops every time they release a new flavour
Even if the Hazelnut is muck, you have to see for yourself. You could be missing out on a revelation.
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Hearts were broken when they discontinued the Mint Chocolate
The memorial service they held for it did nothing to stop the pain.
https://www.facebook.com/MoojuFlavouredMilk/videos/1022125621218381/
Can’t see the video? Click here.
Why do they tease us with constant ‘limited edition’ messing? There’s no loyalty. We can’t get attached to anything cos they’re going to snatch it away from us.
But even though you hurt us, we can’t quit you
We’re fools for Mooju.
Just cool it with the memes, OK?
You don’t need to get down with the kids, Mooju! The kids already love you. All you need to be is your beautiful, milky self.
There. Just gorgeous.
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