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12 things all painfully polite people are guilty of
1. Saying “Excuse me!” or “Sorry!” to inanimate objects
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It’s not your fault shop mannequins these days look like actual people!
2. Ditto when other people bump into you
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They barge on without a word, unaware of you mentally scolding yourself for doing it AGAIN.
3. Overusing the phrase “If it isn’t any trouble”
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Like everything is a massive favour.
4. And panicking when you actually have to ask a favour
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You immediately turn into Hugh Grant in a particularly woeful romantic comedy.
“Sorry, I was just wondering if you might possibly… If it’s OK with you, if you could just…”
5. Letting cold calls go on for FAR too long
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It feels rude to interrupt. But you do have things to do. Is now a good time to cut across? *worries for eternity*
6. Rarely correcting people who get your name wrong
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“And how long have you been in Dublin, Veronica?” No one say anything. SHH. Veronica is my name now. Forever.
7. Agonising over sending food back
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You don’t want to eat lukewarm pasta, but goddamn it if you hate making a ‘scene’.
8. And telling the hairdresser that they made a hames of your hair
“I’ll get you a mirror so you can see it from the back.”
“*chokes* Ah, it’s lovely, thanks!”
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9. Worrying about saying no to something
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What if you’re putting them out by saying no? You wouldn’t want to put them out, like.
10. Spending hours* holding a door open for someone a good distance away
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*Not really hours, but they may as well be.
11. Never letting a sneeze go unblessed
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You’ve been known to utter a “Bless me!” on occasion if no one offers one to you.
12. And having your rage be twice as effective, when you actually unleash it
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Because you’re so afraid of scenes, when you actually cause one, people are SCARED.
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All apologies overly polite polite polite people