WE HAVE MORE slang terms for kissing than we know what to do with, but is it time to cut the fat and admit some of them just aren’t working anymore?

We need to lay down the law. Here are nine of the most popular slang terms for kissing, ranked in order of acceptability.

9. Make out

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“They were making out on the couch.”

Any person who says ‘make out’ watched too much American television as a child. Unacceptable in Ireland.

8. Snog

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“Gis a snog, luv.”

Similarly, any person who uses ‘snog’ non-ironically needs to get their head out of British teen magazines.

7. Maul

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“They were mauling the faces off each other.”

TOO DESCRIPTIVE.

6. Wear

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“Did you get the wear?”

Though not as visceral as ‘maul’, ‘wear’ still implies forceful, prolonged, saliva-heavy kissing. Eww.

5. Meet

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“Did you meet anyone last night?”

And this is too vague. Did you meet someone, or did you MEET someone? We don’t have time for this!

4. Lob the gob

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“John Travolta lobbed the gob on Scarlett Johansson.”

This is funny, we’ll admit. Watch your usage, though – it implies that the person on the receiving end of the lob-gobbing didn’t really know what was coming.

3. Score

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“Did you score last night?”

There’s something slightly congratulatory about this that’s a bit off-putting, but it’s certainly better than a lot of the other options out there.

2. Being ‘with’ someone

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“Did you hear? Mary and John were with each other last night.”

This is kind of cute – it almost implies a meaningful connection. LOL.

1. Shift

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Ireland’s Official Word For Kissing, and for good reason. It’s not overly descriptive, yet isn’t terribly confusing either (unlike some of its brethren). Long may it continue.

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