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Seagulls: A Timeline Of Their Reign Of Terror In Ireland
Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland Sam Boal / Photocall Ireland / Photocall Ireland
IT’S THAT TIME of year again, everyone. You know the one we’re talking about.
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Yes, the nation is at war with seagulls once again after Senator Denis O’Donovan called for a debate to be held on the birds later this year.
But just how did seagulls begin their reign of terror?
Let’s look back to 2014…
July 8th, 2014: It starts.
It started as it always does — a report of a stolen sandwich here, an attempted robbery of a breakfast roll there. But that’s just standard seagull behaviour, right?
July 15th, 2014: Waterford is laid under siege by a laughing seagull named Jonathan
WLR FM / Fcebook WLR FM / Fcebook / Fcebook
Waterfordians were urged not to eat food while walking around the Ardkeen area lest a maniacal seagull named Jonathan steal it. Jonathan was said to “laugh” in the faces of those he stole from.
It was a terrifying few days for the city.
July 17th, 2014: Senator Ned O’Sullivan declares that seagulls have lost the run of themselves
Sick of seagulls “dispossessing” children of lollipops, Senator Ned O’Sullivan (FF) decided that something needed to be done and tells the Seanad that seagulls have “lost the run of themselves”.
It’s met with laughter and derision.
July 17th: The people of Waterford take the streets back from Jonathan the laughing seagull
TheJournal.ie TheJournal.ie
RIP.
July 18th, 2014: The seagulls make Liveline
A man tells RTÉ’s Liveline that a Velociraptor-like seagull took his hamburger straight from his hand. Another caller rings in with a haunting tale of seagulls taking over playgrounds at break time.
“Who’s laughing now?” says Ned O’Sullivan. Somewhere. Probably.
July 18th, 2014: Bressie is beaten up by a seagull
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And seagulls become enemy number one.
Meanwhile, Bressie becomes fixated with seagulls and starts positing a number of seagull-related theories.
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July 23rd, 2014: The seagulls take over Twitter and send this ominous tweet
IS THAT A THREAT?
Rest of the summer, 2014: It’s a seagull’s world and we’re just living in it
In the weeks that follow, footage resurfaces of a seagull savagely eating a rabbit whole and people take to Twitter to share their near-death experiences at the hands (or, rather, wings) of seagulls.
Kayleigh Rogers / Twitter Kayleigh Rogers / Twitter / Twitter
September 15th, 2014: Seagull crusader Ned O’Sullivan refuses to let the issue die
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January 13th, 2015: Ned O’Sullivan throws some shade at seagulls
DUMP-GULLS.
Oh snap.
April 15th, 2015: Seagulls return and start menacing people in their apartments
After a few months of respite, the pesky seagulls return to claim what’s theirs.
In this video, we see two seagulls attempting to barge their way into an apartment on Jervis Street and essentially holding a man hostage.
You wouldn’t see the likes of it on Love/Hate.
April 25th, 2015: A seagull takes a shite in Amanda Brunker’s hair
To show that they are truly taking no prisoners.
July 20th, 2015: A seagull robs a woman’s phone in the National Botanic Gardens
Vanessa Keegan told 98FM that a seagull stole her HTC.
To add insult to injury, he later dropped the phone in the water. The seagulls are mocking us.
July 21st, 2015: And war is officially declared
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Not content to live in a society where seagulls steal HTC phones and swallow rabbits whole, Senator Dennis O’Donovan took the baton from Senator Ned O’Sullivan and made seagulls a matter of national importance once more.
And he did not hold back.
O’Donovan has now said that Ireland should consider culling the seagulls.
The seagulls have yet to respond, but one thing is for certain — this ain’t over.
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