“OK, SO I WAS really drunk Friday (11/1/13) and woke up yesterday morning to find a bike outside my house. I don’t know how it got there.”

That’s how this ad on lost property site Lost.ie begins. Someone – and they’re staying anonymous for the moment – probably stole a bike from central Dublin in a boozy haze. Now they’re having a crisis of conscience and want to return it.

They swear they absolutely can’t remember:

Maybe I stole it, maybe I bought it, maybe I won it in a dance off. I just don’t know. I don’t usually do things like that.

Here’s the ad – the full text is below:

Ok, so I was really drunk Friday (11/1/13) and woke up yesterday morning to find a bike outside my house. I don’t know how it got there. Maybe I stole it, maybe I bought it, maybe I won it in a dance off. I just don’t know. I don’t usually do things like that and would love to return it to its owner. But there’s where things get hard. I have no idea where I got this bike from. I remember being in Industry nightclub in Temple Bar, Dublin and I woke up this morning in my house in Phibsboro. Total blackout. So maybe I took from somewhere in between those two places but to be honest I could have been in Armagh last night for all I know. Anyway, it’s a blue men’s bike. That’s all I can say as the owner will have to be able to describe it to me to get it back. Email me at iamverysorry@hushmail.com if you think it’s yours. This is not a joke, I really want to give this bike back. I’m not a scumbag. Oh, and I lost my wallet. If anyone’s found one let me know. I know, I’d really want to sort my life out.

So… anyone?

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