THE WEATHER IS fine, whip out the barbecue. Or, if it’s raining, that’s OK too.

But here’s what’s gonna go down. Or up… in flames.

1. Most of it will be indoors

Sure we’ll do the hard part in the oven, just to be safe.

BzzAgent BzzAgent

2. It’ll rain

And it was SO lovely an hour ago.

barb-bil barb-bil

3. One person will do everything and will be constantly criticised for it

Prepare to have your technique scrutinised and sabotaged, all while wearing a fancy apron. You gas ticket.

Etsy Etsy

4. Everyone will be paranoid about food poisoning

You’re worried that your disposable barbie isn’t quit up to the job so char everything just to be sure.

Netfurniture Netfurniture

5. Cans are to be found in an ice bucket

Obviously.

indi.ca indi.ca

6. Most things will get burned

Including all the guests.

fiftynightshades fiftynightshades

7. There will be either far too much or far too little to go around

Oh we bought just a perfect amount of food for everyone, said no barbecuer ever.

zimpenfish zimpenfish

8. Burger buns will be forgotten

DAMMIT.

Irishpride Irishpride

9. Flies will try to ruin everything

Cover that salad for the love of God.

Or, the unspeakable could always happen…

Whydidyouwearthat Whydidyouwearthat

10. Things will blow over to the point of annoyance

Sayonara napkin, paper plate, and full set of garden furniture.

11. Everyone will eat too much just because it’s there

Leftovers? We must fight the big fight.

Throw on more condiments to make it go down easier.

Imgur Imgur

12. Neighbours will deeply resent the smell

Jealous much? Sure come in for a beer.

13. People will comment on how there’s ‘still great heat out of that’ hours after the bbq is put out

And dear readers, there was still great heat outta that.

Man selling ‘enchanted’ barbecue on Gumtree>

8 best tweets about Irish barbecues>