GETTING NEW CLOTHES? Fantastic. Shopping for and trying on these new clothes? Worst. Thing. Ever.
1. Firstly, it’s never ever simple
You never just grab a load of clothes, head to the changing room, and try them on. There’s always something there to thwart you.
2. There are the ridiculous fitting room queues
We’re looking at you, Zara.
3. And the stress of tugging the curtains this way and that to ensure you’re fully covered
Having to touch them at all is incredibly upsetting.
4. Then there’s the realisation that the lighting is completely unforgiving
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5. Those side-mirrors that show you angles of yourself you’ve never wished to see
So considerate of you to show us exactly how the light hits the back of our legs. Thanks a lot.
6. The sweat. Dear god the sweat
There is no such thing as a pleasantly cool changing room.
7. Having to ask for another size and just standing around half-naked until it arrives
*thinks about life and choices*
8. One word: Jeans
Can’t get into them, can’t get out of them. Maybe I should just get used to my second skin.
9. The thorough annihilation of your self-confidence when things don’t fit
“It’s fine, I hate having nice things anyway.”
10. And the sheer embarrassment when you get stuck in something
You could be left like this FOREVER.
11. So you resolve to never try on in the shop ever again…
…But you always find yourself staring at your sweaty, poorly-lit reflection in some River Island fitting room or other. You can’t stay away.
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