You don’t know the meaning of tired

In your thirties you will develop an obsession with how much sleep you get.

You will never get enough, you will take nanna naps, and you will consider going to the chemist for “a tonic”.

Go ahead, enjoy those chipper chips… while you still can

Losing weight in you twenties is just laying off the chicken wings and going for a brisk stroll every once in a while.

Losing weight in your thirties is paying someone to shout at you three times a week while you lug weights around, wondering if your face will ever not be this shade of puce.

Never been to a wedding? RELISH IT!

Be careful what you wish for.

Can work through a hangover no problem? RELISH THAT TOO!

Work after six drinks in your twenties:

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Work after six drinks in your thirties:

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There is more to cheese than cheddar

The older you get, the more important cheese becomes to you.

Words like ‘Manchego’ and ‘Wensleydale’ will become vital parts of your vocabulary, and the idea of eating an Easy Single will become abhorrent.

Splatter Splatter

There is more to wine than drinking it because that’s all there is on offer at your mam’s house

And there is more to wine that ‘red’ or ‘white’.

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A time will come when you will care about the difference between tea towels and hand towels

YES THERE’S A DIFFERENCE!

And when you’re buying your own tea towels based on absorbency rather than cheapness, you’ll care if someone is wiping their grubby paws on them.

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A time will came when you don’t care what people think/say about you

Trust us.

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